You know things are bad when:
1. Treasury Secretary Henry Paulson has become a principal character in your dreams. It’s true. In my most recent bedtime fantasies I am chatting it up with the 62-year-old mastermind of the government bailout package. Never mind the fact that I have never before dreamt about figures like Robert Downey Jr., Lance Armstrong or Mason Jennings. No. Apparently my idea of a good time in bed is talking economic policy with Paulson. Totally disturbing I realize.
2. The Red Sox are down 3 games to 1in the ALCS … against the Devil Rays. (I know, I should be over this shock by now. But come on – it’s the Rays. Just a year ago these would have been gimme games.) And not to be a total pessimist and unbeliever, but I don’t see us bouncing back quite the same way we did last year. Not unless two things miraculously occur in the next 24 hours: We start scoring. We stop being giant whores who just give home runs away. It’s embarrassing. Do we need to start taking shots before games again? Does someone need to undergo experimental surgery prior to pitching? Whatever it is, I hope Tito figures it out overnight. Because right now we kind of look ridiculous.
I tried to find something positive to include in this post about the current state of the Nation. The only thing I can come up with is the fact that yesterday I received my first piece of political paraphernalia in the mail – a bumper sticker containing the phrase “That One ’08” that is now pasted on the back of my car. Now, if only Obama could pitch …