TRADE MANNY

Dear Manny,

Have fun in Florida.

These past seven years have been special, but I think we all knew this day would come. It will be hard at first. We will miss you and your childish antics and the way you never quite grasped the concept of hustling. We will keep the championships and lose the attitude. Thanks for the rings.

When packing your bags please don’t forget your ego.

As far as your replacement goes – Jacoby will do just fine. He’s more fun to watch anyway. (And yes Dave, I’m bringing sexy into this. I make no apologies.)

The kiddies will be disappointed of course. All those T-shirts they will have to forfeit wearing in the name of decency. To be honest I still wear my Nomar jersey. He had a lot more class. (I don’t recall Nomar pushing 60-year-olds around the ballpark.)

Your comments this week made everything clear. I’d rather have you sit on the bench for the rest of the season than infect the clubhouse with more of your poison. Like Brett Favre’s front office, I wish Boston’s would offer to pay you not to play. You do not deserve to take the field in a Red Sox uniform.

We can win a championship without you. We have a thing called depth. And heart.

Good luck with the Marlins.

Besos,

Kristen

cc: Theo Epstein, Tito, John Henry, Larry Luchino, Tom Werner

3 thoughts on “TRADE MANNY

  1. is someone from the red sox front office actually reading my blog? i never thought they would actually pull the trigger on this trade. things in the clubhouse must have been really bad…

  2. Muns, they really are reading your blog, especially that part where you wished they’d pay Manny not to play…because they are paying him to play somewhere else (did you hear they are paying the rest of his salary to play in LA?).

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